The other day I met you. And you were beautiful.
But today I got to know you. And you were eager to please. Your eyes looked around for encouragement, and your mouth hesitated before it spoke, your mind took a second too long to respond. I could see in the way you flipped your hair, flashed that smile, and checked your lipstick your words weren’t all that important to you. Today I got to know and you were eager to please.
On the way to a poetry slam tonight I saw a boy riding a skateboard. For a split second I wanted to honk at him but I thought twice. He was white, he had just right amount of shaggy in his hair. He was sweaty, he was trying to master his frontside 360. And as I watched him get farther and farther away in my review mirror I whispered to him. I told him how intriguing he was to me, and that all he needed to do was lift his foot a bit more to bring his board all the way around.
Today a girl decided she could preach to me about love. I could tell this girl was far more experienced than I. I could tell by the way she curled her lip when she spoke the word ‘love’ it was something sweet to her. But it brought too many unwelcome names back that she didn’t care to share. You could tell she had been hurt too many times to put the words love and hate in the same sentence. You could tell that her mind was on the boy she had learned to dream for. The boy she would give herself up to. Today a girl got in front of me to talk about love. You could tell by the way the curled her lip when she said the word that she had made love to too many boys to even begin to pretend like she knew the meaning. She was only sixteen.
This girl had been praised way to many times. She lacked the humble words of wisdom she thought she gave. You could tell by her cocky smile that confidence wasn’t what made her stride it was her pride. She closed her eyes and she read her first line, and she dared me. She said, I dare you to be someone different, someone kind, someone who can make another cold corpse feel warm again. She dared me to make a difference.
Girl number four brings me to subject number five. Subject number five doesn’t have a gender because they seem to think they’re above all. They seem to think that other people are here just to fill the empty spaces on a sign up list. They stomp on the abled bodied and spit on the crippled. But they are the real problem because they lack the ability to understand where this girl or boy might be coming from. This subject lacks the compassion to set people free from their own lies. This subject is the type to base your worth off of how many people listen to you. To this subject I say learn your history because the quiets ones are the people with the most to say. To this one I say humble yourself, or the silence will take you too.
Today this boy told me I waited to long. He told me that I should be smart enough to know that I should always take the stairs because waiting for the elevator takes too long. He said that I should dot my t’s and cross my i’s because it’s really all the same. He said I should run everywhere within walking distance, and only slow down for what is beautiful. He said to leave the negativity in the wind and to cry whenever I want to. Whether it’s tears of joy, or tears for the fallen. He also said when your done, smile. Because smiling helps the pain go away, and there will be pain. And he didn’t wish me luck, he says he doesn’t wish anyone luck. Luck is for the ones who think they’re not good enough on the own.
Today I talked about passion. I talked about how it runs through a persons veins, and it burns their skin. I talked about not having passion. But I couldn’t get my sentences to articulate. I couldn’t get my words to conform.
Today I got to got to know you, while staring at the boy on the skateboard and hoping not to become the girl who’d been loved and broken to many times. Today I got to know you while hoping not judge only to be judged… but I didn’t want to wait and find out whether I would be girl number four or subject number five. Today I got to know you which only help me know myself, and I fear not having passion, I fear being eager to please others I fear drifting into oblivion."
— I fear the eight random things that mean a lot to me right now… (Via letitbepoet)
She tilted her head up toward the crying sky
Whispering in short, ragged breaths to God,
“Don’t let the warriors of the knight start battling. Don’t let them scream. Don’t let thunder be the outcome.”
This fear alone was too loud to control"
— K.s.m (inkdust-atdusk)
I am beginning to run out of ways to say "I love you"
strong enough to let you know I mean it.
It was past 10 o’clock and we had already said goodnight
when I dialed your number with shaking fingers, ran into the parking lot
and told you to meet me
when I said I loved you for the first time.
I have already fallen in love with you,
but words are so restraining I cannot tell you what exactly
I’m falling into this time—
but I have not yet left the clouds since I got here.